RIVIERA HASH TRASH 623
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Wedgie & Jon
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Hash Christmas do - Saturday 5th December
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The following run report is from the hash on Sunday 18th October, written by No Satisfaction
Sadist and Sinex 'Easy Like Sunday Morning' HASH stroll
Rolling up casually late, it was good to see a strong turn out in the carpark for this early start.
The crowd was relaxed, sitting around reading bits of 'Roadrunners' Sunday papers, or patting dogs.
Noone really cared that there was no 'Religious Advisor'. It was all quite fun already in the sunshine.
Then 'Perpetual Motion' adopted all too readily his 'Sargent Major' persona and whipped us into shape.
Interesting to see this run was attended by a host of (almost 10) one -time athletic runners, even without those training for the 'Marathon'.
We stumbled off on the sodden trail through the still rural, yet suburban environs of 'Villeneuve Loubet'.
The trail followed several roads, circled many roundabouts, taking in quite a bit of 'up', and even one or two checks.
Despite the fierce storms the night before, there seemed to be more flour than normal.
There was a fair bit of hanging around done at checks. It took a while for any one of us to stroll off to have a half -hearted look for the trail.
Otherwise, there was more important business to be done. We all had to catch up with the gossip.
Running the trail seemed secondary so early on this Sunday.
Most exercise was done actually wagging the chin at the 'beer stop'. Here the crisps were great. But I was too busy talking to read what flavour they were.
Something like 'beef and cardboard'.
After about 10 packets of crisps, we sped off again, with 'Cumalot' as our 'front running bastard'. That's how fast!
There were some pleasant views of 'Villeneuve Chateau' and the 'Haut Cagnes Chateau' and the sweet sound of barking dogs all along the route, which meant we had to talk much louder.
At one point, a very cordial local resident even had to interrupt our chatting, by calling and waving from her balcony, to indicate where the trail actually went.
Here one or two of us stopped in wonderment at the sight of a beautiful Japanese tree, (see picture) which was so significant, that 'Sadist' had to point it out to us, since we were talking and nearly walked (sorry, ran) straight past it.
This is the reason the 'Walkers' finally caught us up. We were busy discussing the tree of course. I still don't know were they suddenly all came from, but they were on us, at some point even in front of us! 'Roadrunner' had seen them coming and managed to get running before being caught out.
He was seen steaming up the hill, out of sight, with Anne strolling along beside him.
But now I know he was just running to grab the best place on the park bench back at the car park.
Relieved to arrive at the 'Circle', it was all made worthwhile when 'Piedo' opened the bar, put on the music and started serving his special 'gin and tonics'.
I swear he mixes the best on the 'Riviera' Worth running a HASH for!
Our replacement 'Religious Advisor' did a truly admirable job, swiftly administering the 'down down's and fabricating various crimes to all and sundry (see below).
Nevermind if just this once there was a little less pace than normal. It was great to see everyone and catch up. 'On On' until the next time!! 'No Satisfaction'
Hares: 'Sinex' and 'Sadist'
Reading 'Sunday Times' and wearing hats: 'Roadrunner',
'Disco Dave' and 'Diarrhea'
New Mug: 'Virgin Mouth'
Wearing a HASH T -shirt but not having attended the HASH/Cross
-dressing: 'Anne'no -name and 'Roadrunner'
Complaining about lack of flour on the 'Walkers' Trail':
'Contessa' and 'Jingle Balls'
Turning up on time and surprising everyone: 'Contessa'
'Returners': 'Little Pinkie', 'Roadrunner' and Leslie no name
'Shit of the week' Nominations:
Resident Nominee: 'Sneaky Bastard' and 'false accusations' about 'Piedo'
'Piedo' for constantly reading the Sunday papers and no longer talking to us
'Shit of the Week': awarded to 'Sadist':
For flogging the 'HASH' gold reserves and giving away our 'Golden Turd' to another 'HASH.
Someone having their say
The very well written, last run report contained a reference to a certain, 'Piedo'.
For you information, if you have to write a run report his given name is, 'Paedophil', Paedo from the Greek, 'pais', (How they got that from that, I do no know, but obviously Skinny Ah So will be able to verify this) meaning child and Phil being his other name.
Now you might just draw your own conclusions from this, unless you also know that our own Paedophil, at one time used to be the, 'Arthur Daley', of children's clothing, with his very own emporium of bespoke clothing lines for the well heeled, discerning infant with their pretentious mothers.
Therefore, two and two make five, but to you I will let you have it for four and a half.
This was before he gave it all up to become, a dirty old man.
As he said, 'You cannot be a dirty young man', and since reaching 60 he thinks he now qualifies!
This is from somebody who knows!
From your previous correspondence regarding Hash Names, I should also like to point out, although I realise it is rude to point and I shall probabley receive a Down Down for this, the Hash name for Diarrhea is not spelt that way.
It is actually, 'Dire Rear', and Padre informs me she actually received this name because,she is a very slow runner and she was always being left behind. She said,'It is dire ehere, ne cést pas', or something like that, said with heavy French accent. Or Dire Rear if you have Padre's accute sense of hearing or, if she is not reading this, try running behind her to see if the name fits!
Some photos from the Marathon
Also see the Receeding Hare Line!
R*n 625: NEXT HASH 15-Nov
This week's run will be a relaxing stroll round the old town and other evil parts of 'Nizza la Bella', or just plain Nice if you prefer. It wil be organized or more probably disorganized by Wedgie, a Dublin hasher who spends as little time as possible in Dublin, perhaps because the weather is so much more relaxing in Nice, and Jon South.
If you don't already know these two they are the ones responsible for the 'Snug' that irish pub in the old town, which is where we will be eating afterwards, and as this is the only pub that serves gastro food in the old town ( that's gastro as in gastronomic, not as in gastro- enteritis), and as they have three full time chefs, the food will almost certainly be of a higher standard than usual on the hash.
Meeting at 12.00 for 12.30 at the Snug, corner of rue Rossetti and rue Droit in the old town of Nice. The Snug opens at 12.00 so if you get there on time you can have a coffee or a beer or even both while you're waiting.
Any questions contact Jon on 06 47 42 04 15 or me Pedo on 06 14 76 38 23.
Don't miss this opportunity to try the food at the Snug if you haven't already done so!