RIVIERA HASH TRASH 569
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Perth Interhash, 21st - 23rd March 2008
The U.K. Nash Hash 28/08 – 31/08/08. Organised by Edinburgh HHH,
Marathon Bhutan, 7th September 2008
Run 569- Back to the Brague
Of course it sounded from the instructions that it would be a confusing run- 'parking either on the left or the right of the road' 'the hare has been suffering from ill health'. However the sun appeared especially for the hash after several days of torrential rain, and we parked on the left side of the road, though if you came from the Valbonne direction, you would have parked on the right side; as this was the sunny side we didn't mind hanging around until Pedo turned up. No doubt many people hadn't looked out of the window in the morning to see what a nice day it was and stayed at home. Flying Finn was here again after her transfer from Milan and Bordighera. The meeting was scheduled for 10.30 for 11- but it looked like being for 11.30. Even then Contessa managed to make it a late arrival after we had all left. We did mind a bit though when after giving us the usual bullshit about it being extremely flat apart from the uphill and the downhill bits, the hare kept us waiting while he made several phone calls, but eventually as 11.30 was sounded he pointed us towards the start of the trail.
Unsurprisingly this was down towards the Brague. A steep path zigzagged down to the river and where here was a check. Dirty Dingus had taken the FRB lead was checking to right - but he was shortly to return as this was a falsie, so we all took the left and ran along by the river which was in full flood after all the rain . Maybe there wouldn't be any river crossings as the hare had looked remarkably dry at the start and it wasn't really the weather to enjoy splashing around in the water. The trail began to look familiar and Padre and I knew where it would come out by the main road. Some interesting mushrooms were growing on the trail but Padre's mycological expertise said that they shouldn't be picked unless they could be cooked within two hours. No wild haggis were seen during the run-but we are told that Fairy Plongeur has smuggled in supplies from Britain for the next hash. Well we came out near the Biot drilling yard- they still haven't found oil in the area- and up a steep hill- Sudsucker chose to check out the downhill falsie-Dingus by then had caught up and went into the lead again and soon disappeared into the distance with Perpetch; we weren't to see them again until the beerstop.
Those of us who walked up the hill lost touch with the FRBs by the time we reached the main road again. We soon found ourselves back at the start- well the instructions had said it would be an extremely short run- and being enthusiastic we thought we might as well do a second lap as lunch would not be until two. This time however when we reached the Brague we all turned right along the river until we came to a check where the river was bridged and then the trail was found up an uphill track. Eventually we caught up with the walkers and came out on a new housing area and the beer stop. Dingus had been there for some time but Perpetch had run on -would we see him again?
Most runners and walkers managed to arrive at the beer stop around the same time; but there were a few stragglers- Mad Max, Cumalot and Big End appeared at the end of the road and were so anxious to get to the beer that Max and Cumalot sprinted the last section. Perpetch eventually turned up. Refreshments were welcome, even though a small number of alcoholics had chosen to abstain (temporarily, I should add). Sadist announced he was having his first beer for 2008, but the bottle he selected by chance happened to be a non-alcoholic variety.
But Dire Rear and Two Cheeky were missing. A phone established that they were back at the start wondering whether they had to go beyond the first loop.Toss Pot saved chocolate for them. But we couldn't wait and we set off on the loop at the start of the second half. Perpetch had enjoyed the loop so much the first time that he did it again. Peter had walked the first half with Evelyn and Eleanor, his mother and sister, but Padre took him under his wing to run the second half and have explained the arcane secrets of hashing. No doubt as the result of her marathon training, Supermarket Trolley glad to be on tarmacadam, kept up with Dingus and Perpetch past the beer car and back to the Brague, where Dingus felt he had not done enough falsies and went off to find his own run in, in the process collecting an abandoned ironing board to add to the beermeister's collection. Dire Rear too was collecting, having found a discarded wallet along the trail- as there was no money in it, no hashers wanted to claim it- well maybe she will hand it in to the police as there was an ID card and driving licence. Perhaps the fire service or the ambulance should have been called as steam was seen to be emanating from Jobsworth's head- was this an explosion or just a party trick?
Dingus ran the circle and Down Downs were given to-
The Hare- Pedo
The mugless-Supermarket Trolley,Jobsworth
The beerless- Sadist, Padre, Pedo, Jobsworth
The enthusiasts who did extra trail- Perpetch, Dingus
The competitive- Mad Max , Cumalot
Those missing the beer stop- Dire Rear, Two Cheeky
The latecomer- Contessa
The Eagle Eye- Dire Rear
The Gentleman- TossPot
The scribes- Sadist, Farty Bum
The birthday boy- Mad Max
The Dirty Old Man- Pedo
The Virgins- Evelyn, Peter, Eleanor, Marlene
Shit of the week nominees were ( guess who) Sneaky Bastard who had previously not been nominated this year and Pedo who was nominated by Sneaky Bastard for nominating him.
The votes went to Sneaky Bastard.
OnOnOn in Biot at the restaurant on the corner where Pedo in a virtuoso demonstration of multitasking, explained what the choices were, got the wine and bread organised, passed out the plates, collected the plates, and in a complete reversal of the Shit of the Week nominations, was complimented by Sneaky Bastard on his talents as a waiter. Sneaky Bastard was also heard to say that he wished he had 'a long black one'- we don't know what Jingle Balls will have to say about that.
Also see the Receeding Hare Line!
R*n 570: NEXT HASH 27-Jan
Hunt The Haggis, Near Le Rouret.