Run 515: with RA Padre

A hardy group of Hashers were blown into the car park by hurricane force winds on the sea front in Villefranche, congregating in the fragrant shelter of the beachside conveniences.

Following the debacle of the directions to the previous run north of Nice (here all the Hashers followed the directions to the letter but unfortunately the last few letters were missing) these directions were vague enough for most of the walkers to be scattered all along the coast from Villeneuve Loubet to Imperia.

As a result, Toggle Oggle was the only walker to find the start. Fortunately(?) for her, Pedophil volunteered to act as chaperone, as he still had a doctors note after over exercising his wrist. Or was it shoulder?

With the optimistic cry of "at least being by the sea means it will be flat" the group sped off and soon found themselves running through narrow alleys and up & down near vertical steps which demonstrated the knack of Padre and Bid End to find challenging gradients anywhere.

Soon we found ourselves running between the huge villas of the rich and famous on the peninsular of Ian Saint-Jean the Caped Ferrat (I think that was the place, it was very windy). Strangely, all the cars here seemed to have Monaco or GB plates. Hmmm.

Stopping only briefly for a beerstop at the zoo the animals (I mean Hashers) moved swiftly on. At this point Toggle Oggle decided to become a runner. Whether this was due to her recent bionic implants going over their 6000 step running-in period or the fact that there was nothing wrong with Pedophil’s hands and they were back in full wandering order, was not clear.

With the gale force winds at our back we soon reached the circle, some faster than others due to blatant short-cutting by scribes that shall remain anonymous.

Having produced a first class trail at short notice, the Hares excelled themselves in finding for the circle a corner of a car park next to a drain from which was emanating a perfume that was less Eau de Cologne and more Odour Cagnes. Phew!

Pedophil was volunteered to be RA but spent so long breathing heavily into his mobile, Padre had to step in. This made SotW a foregone conclusion but the formalities had to be gone through and Henry was nominated by Prestressed for beating old men and then Prestressed was nominated for nominating Henry.

Naturally, Pedophil won and took his punishment like a true Hasher while Prestressed resorted to bending the solemn rules of the Hash by emptying his ‘chamber pot of shame’ on Henrys head rather than his own. The previously invisible Rachel then joined Henry in a long running water fight with Prestressed at the end of the circle in which honour was satisfied on both sides.

After the circle, a small but determined group managed to gatecrash a restaurant and be served an excellent meal. In the spirit of international co-operation, the maitre’d offered the group a complimentary limoncella on the understanding they never returned to the restaurant again. However, Pedophil produced another doctors note saying that his medication could only be accompanied by a complimentary vintage cognac.

After (down-)downing the cognac Pedo hastily departed in order to check out the rumour that the ‘ladies of the early-evening’ were doing a special for the more refined gent with a doctors note but sadly for him, they were all at the Cannes Film festival, the brazen hussies!

Hares: BigEnd and Padre

Returner: Piers

Birthday: Two Cheeky

Competitive Running: Henry

Sexual acts with Toggle Oggle: Pedophil

Sexual acts with Two Cheeky: Pedophil

Promiscuity: Pedophil

For running ALL the falsies: Sadist

‘Volunteering’ to be scribe: Cumalot

Leering and smelling: Piers

Shit of the Week: Pedophil